Damaged. Broken. Less than whole. Is that really how we should see survivors?

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When scrolling through social media these days, it is difficult to miss posts related to rape and child protection. While these issues receive attention, especially after disturbing incidents, I am always left with a few concerning thoughts about how we, as a society, respond.

The first is how attention tends to be short-lived and reactive rather than sustained. In many cases, serious issues such as child safety or sexual harassment only become widely discussed when they are highlighted by the media. After a short period of public attention, the conversation fades. The attention these stories receive seems to depend on many factors, including who is involved, whether the victim or perpetrator is well known, and possible political gain. To me, it is quite complex to understand why one incident receives so much attention while another does not.

A recent example that stood out to me was the incident where a toddler drowned in a pond at a daycare centre. It received strong public attention for a short time, and many concerns were raised online, especially by parents and child protection advocates. But soon after, the discussion moved on. As a society, did we take any concrete steps after this incident to improve safety standards in childcare settings? For example, do we even have a clear, up-to-date registry or monitoring system for daycare centres, at least at the local administrative level? Without systems like this, it feels like we are mostly reacting after tragedies rather than preventing them.

The second concern is about how society views and speaks about survivors of sexual violence.

There is no question that sexual violence is a serious crime, and perpetrators must be held accountable through the justice system. However, from my limited professional experience, I have seen situations where survivors are blamed or judged, sometimes by authorities and even by people close to them.

Beyond institutions, language in society also plays a role. I recently came across a post by a woman discussing sexual harassment and survivors of sexual violence. In her writing, she used terms like “withered flowers” (“milina unu mal”) to describe survivors. While her intention was clearly to advocate for justice and highlight the harm done to victims, I felt that such language can also create an impression that survivors are permanently “damaged.”

Damaged. Broken. Less than whole. Is that really how we should see survivors?

Sexual violence can indeed cause deep psychological and physical trauma. Recovery is often difficult and may take time, and some effects may last. In a country like ours, where support systems are not very strong or well-regulated, the recovery period may be longer for some. But that does not mean a person loses their worth or becomes defined by what happened to them.

From my perspective, if society begins to see survivors as “damaged” or “broken,” even unintentionally, it can add another layer of harm. It may affect how others treat them and how they see themselves, which can become a barrier to recovery and rebuilding their lives.

Survivors need justice, but they also need a social environment that supports healing without labels that reduce their identity to their experience of harm.

Justice is not only about punishment. It is also about how a society allows people to heal afterwards.